Lifestyle Archives - Freelance Amy

The Right View: A Freelancer (Re)discovers Buddhism

2021-07-07

A statue of the Buddha demonstrates the right view as it overlooks a large coy pond. — Image by Silentpilot from Pixabay

I’ve rediscovered Western Buddhism and subsequently the concept of “the right view” (I’ll explain that shortly). By “rediscover,” I mean that I read a book about it once. I then nodded my head at some fascinating concepts, set it aside for several years to go on with my life as it was, and finally circled back to it along with related resources.

I’ve always been drawn to the notion of a religion that didn’t have to be a religion. Although it can be treated as deeply spiritual, Buddhism has multiple schools of thought. That means the basic philosophy actually encourages each individual’s own interpretation.

Note of warning: This post is a bit of a departure from my usual ones. It has less structure than my regular writings because I’m still learning where to take these thoughts. Thanks in advance for bearing with me on my little journey …

Budding Buddhist

So I’ve begun to really take this life view, this right view, more seriously in my search for peace and purpose. Actually, I began with the goal of finding a way to manage my anxiety.

In my research, I’ve been most fascinated so far with the concept of “right view.” And that’s the first step on that famous eightfold path you may have heard about.

The right view means that you see things as they truly are—as far as I’ve learned in my limited initial studies anyway, which include:

joining the Secular Buddhism Facebook group and listening to the related podcasts by Noah Rasheta;
rereading that first book Buddhism: Plain and Simple; and
examining Robert Wright’s engaging and provocatively titled Why Buddhism Is True.

But having the right view doesn’t mean that you can tell that your neighbor is lying about the dog poo on your yard. Neither can you tell that my makeup is just a mask to cover up my puffy eyes. It means that you shed the delusions that were imposed by society, your own fears and judgments, and even natural selection.

Natural Selection

This last, natural selection, fascinates me the most because I am drawn to the science of it all. I mean you could argue the other two are also scientific if you look at the right view from a sociological and psychological standpoint. And I’m not going to say I’m not curious about that as well.

In fact, the field of evolutionary psychology likely tackles all of that. I don’t know. That’s next on my reading list.

Anyway, to get back to these delusions, natural selection comes into play when we worry about what others think of us and become obsessed when we fear we’ve said the wrong thing in a brief exchange at a friend’s barbecue.

(I mean, there’s more to it than that, but I need to focus on something or I’ll end up going off on a confusing tangent.)

Back in hunter-gatherer days, as Robert Wright describes, you would likely see the potential offendee 20 minutes later and would resolve the issue that quickly. This was a useful fear in those times because it kept the peace in a fragile community.

But in modern times, you may never see that person again. And fearing others’ judgments can literally be detrimental to your health and well-being.

If you constantly think that others are upset with you or even hate you, you can end up depressed, unable to work, and unable to take proper care of yourself.

Natural selection does that on purpose for the primitive society it was meant for. But it didn’t envision our modern world in which we are less likely to see the person again anytime soon.

The Right View in Freelancing

How does all this discussion on the right view relate to freelancing? As a freelancer, I not only have to cope with the anxiety around constantly needing to drum up business and keep up with my own projects at the same time, but I also have to cope with the isolation that contributes to my anxiety.

When I do venture out of my cave, er, office, I have to think about what I’m going to wear besides my usual yoga pants and whether I should listen to music instead of be more open to the world around me.

All this is worsened by my understanding that others will see me, and I have to interact politely. They’ll all be looking at me! Should I even bother?

The right view is to realize, though, that they are not all looking at me. The right view is also understanding that worrying about what others think of me contributes to the delusion that they even care at all.

They may notice my yoga pants and that I’m listening to music. However, my concern that they really give a hoot about that is evolution ensuring that I keep the peace in the community.

Sure, if one were to flip a neighbor off or go out wearing symbols of hate speech, the peace will certainly be disrupted. But that extreme is rare when I consider what I normally see from day to day. And those are certainly not actions I would ever consider taking anyway!

The Right View in Life

The right view is also seeing the other people going about their lives planting flowers, cleaning out their garage, and heading off to work.

A small single cloud in a big blue sky with tree tops in the foreground — One lonely cloud one day

It’s seeing the birds flying overhead, the lizards darting on the sidewalk, the clouds moving across the blue, and even the incessant leaf blower across the street (also don’t forget the person managing that contraption).

The right view is also the smell of freshly cut grass, the promise of coming rain, the scent of sunblock on my skin, and even dog poo. It’s the honking of cranes, purring of my cat, buzzing of cicadas, and screaming of car alarms.

All of these exist at once, before me and all of us. It’s with us as we cope with everyday anxiety and the business of running a business.

Thus, getting wrapped up in the specifics may hold us back from the lovely whole outside and all around us. The inner worries were put there by natural selection to keep us in check, but we can free ourselves by remembering to take the right view by looking up and all around every once in a while.

Thanks for joining me on this first meander!

My First Real Job:
Getting Started in K–12 Education

2021-04-14

Photograph of Freelance Amy with her parents on college graduation day a few months before her first real job — My mom, me, and my dad on college graduation day

When I graduated college, bachelor of arts in foreign languages with a minor in art in hand, I was pretty proud of myself. Until I realized I had no idea what I was going to do next. As a first-generation college graduate, I was mostly just figuring it out for myself. My parents’ advice was pretty spot on, though: get your first real job.

But I was back home in rural upstate New York, where the degree I had didn’t get me a whole lot. The options included the summer jobs I’d done as a:

night-shift drive-thru cashier at Dunkin Donuts, where I got flashed by the pantsless pervert of Pulaski, New York; or
convenience store clerk selling lottery tickets and occasionally renting out porn from the box we stored at the back.

AmeriCorps: First Real Job?

So I applied to AmeriCorps for my first real job, sort of. I would maybe help fight forest fires in California or educate people on the environment in Colorado. And I didn’t get in.

Clearly, the search for my first real job was looking bleak. Furthermore, I was clueless about how to make this French degree work for me. I knew I didn’t want to live the rest of my adult life in upstate New York. However, I didn’t know how I was going to resolve that problem.

The Eiffel Tower taken from underneath and close up. — I took this photo on a recent trip to Paris.

But then I found out about the local AmeriCorps chapters. And it turned out a nearby high school was looking for a paraprofessional to help out in the high school special education department.

Moreover, they needed someone to shadow a student who had just moved with her family from France. That circumstance was pretty bizarre considering how isolated that little school was.

So, in the middle of nowhere, I was competing against people who very likely had no knowledge of French beyond “bonn-jore.” It was a no-brainer to bring me on. My French degree was already paying off!

First Day on the First Real Job

An open door to a school hallway to my first real job

I did get a stipend and I had to report to “work” during a particular set of hours every day. So the volunteer gig sure felt like my first real job. The day before the school year began, I attended a staff development day. That’s when I met the teachers I would be working with.

My supervisor, the senior special education teacher, needed assistance with his students who struggled with reading and writing. Understandably, my stint as an interpreter for my apparent first real job did not sit well with him. His concerns would not go unaddressed, as you’ll find out shortly.

The next day, I met the 15-year-old French student who did not speak a word of English. She was noticeably in full-on culture shock but seemed to be handling the situation as well as can be expected.

However, my supervisor soon managed to get me transferred back to the special education department. The French student, consequently, was assigned a peer to work with her, which was probably much more appropriate anyway.

Finally Getting Started as a Volunteer Paraprofessional

Classroom with empty desks and chairs the day of my first real job

He introduced me to the students as they arrived and explained what I would be doing in my first real job. My main responsibility was to support juniors and seniors (ages 16–18) by going to their classes, taking notes, and keeping track of assignments and exams.

When there was an exam, I made sure students were provided their appropriate and specific accommodations. Those accommodations or modifications included extra time, dictation, transcription, breaks, or an alternative testing environment.

Sometimes I felt like I was back in high school and not at my first real job. That wasn’t hard to imagine considering I was 22, going on 15 in the looks department. The custodians all thought I was a student anyway.

No Easy First Real Job

A chalkboard graphic shows a headless teacher with a question mark where her head should be.

You might have guessed this was no easy first real job. For sure, the senior teacher had far more responsibilities, but ensuring high school students, some of whom towered over me, stayed on track with their studies was a huge challenge for meek little Amy straight out of college.

Add to that the fact that these students had particular struggles that included not only dyslexia but also behavioral and emotional issues. Some of them came from low-income families, neglectful households, and a history of abuse.

These kids had not been handed an easy start in life. And this rural high school heavily depended on the AmeriCorps program’s annual litter of fresh new volunteers, some embarking on their first real job.

I spent 10 months with the students and learning about their struggles. Although I determined that working with high school students would not be my ultimate path, I gained an appreciation for the good work these teachers were doing to ensure all students had the opportunity to be included.

In fact, inclusion was the key word in this program. The goal was to provide access to the same information that all kids had access to. And that’s the hallmark of modern accessibility guidelines, which I talk about in my post about editing and writing with accessibility in mind.

20 Years Later

Indeed, my first real job opened up a passionate interest of mine that has only blossomed over the past two decades. Over the years, I have somehow always gravitated toward work that promotes equal opportunity to quality education.

In fact, most of my clients come from education. I regularly get to work on training materials for new teachers and coaches that address early childhood education in low-income communities, trauma-informed care, and children at risk for or with developmental delays.

Although that first real job happened more than 20 years ago now, I have always held a soft spot in my heart whenever I work on materials related to the special education field.

My Work These Days

As a copy editor and publication designer, I work with subject matter experts and project managers who are developing research studies, training manuals, online courses, web content, and books for publication that aim to improve the lives of all children.

You can see, in fact, samples of my relevant work in the field in my online portfolio. Check out especially:

the series of briefs on the California Early Math Initiative;
the coaching guide for the Dual Language Learner Supports Project; and
the series of video training guides for home visitors.

And my latest gig is editing online courses in French. So, you could say that, in a way, I have come full circle. I’m using my French degree to support an inclusive environment for all learners in the K–12 system, a system I first started in as my first real job.

If you enjoyed this post, please comment or share using one of the links below. And don’t forget to subscribe to Freelance Amy for updates on other posts, freelancing tips, a recipe each week, and free access to my ebook Quick Guide to Freelancing.

Finally, if you would like to brush up on your writing skills, check out my editing course on Udemy or get it as a bundle with my time management course on LearnDesk.

Quality Sleep Solutions for Freelancers: Top 6 Tips

2021-03-17

Woman sitting at her desk but lying down on top fast asleep

A good night’s sleep on the regular is important for your brain and body. That’s why quality sleep solutions, routines, and habits are highly searched-for terms on Google.

Quick heads-up:
This post contains affiliate links. I earn a small commission should you decide to purchase items I recommend via affiliate links.

Most of us already know that sleep is important. We have it told to us over and over. But societal norms also repeatedly trump those concerns.

When I had a so-called real job, quality sleep solutions would have come in handy. I was waking up at 6:00 every day just to make it into work by 7:45. I would have just enough time for a quick bathroom stop before grabbing some office-quality coffee and settling into my cubicle by 8:00.

Sometimes, I would have a particularly difficult time finding the right quality sleep solutions for a decent slumber the night before. If I knew I didn’t have the usual crushing workload, I’d guiltily call in “sick” the next morning. Being tired was not the same as being sick, in my mind.

Some sleep scientists would beg to differ, though. We need quality sleep solutions to be dependable, competent employees or consultants. As such, I think more priority needs to be placed on them.

Fortunately for freelancers, we have a bit more freedom to ensure this important health responsibility is fulfilled. Indeed, over the last decade or so, I’ve built up my own toolbox of quality sleep solutions.

So here are my top six quality sleep solutions in no particular order. You know which ones you need to work on the most, I’m sure!

1. Eat lightly in the evening

Evening salad as a quality sleep solution with chopped veggies, light dressing, edamame, and sliced avocado — My dinner salad

Among one of the many quality sleep solutions, make sure to have a light meal for dinner. Avoid snacks after that as well.

Granted, I occasionally break that rule for a celebration or have a small dessert. But I keep to the rule any other day, which ensures I don’t go too overboard when I do indulge.

Try a colorful healthy salad that doesn’t have to be all that boring. Chop up some carrots, red cabbage, celery, cucumber, bell peppers, and black olives like I do.

I then top it with some crumbled feta and a drizzle of homemade honey Dijon dressing. I finish it off with a side of sliced avocado and edamame for a final treat. As another one of my quality sleep solutions, I avoid complex carbs at night. Those are harder on the digestive system.

I encourage you to also cut back on complex carbs at night to avoid what’s called silent reflux. That’s acid reflux without any symptoms, but the acid is still damaging to your stomach and esophagus.

Aside from that, quality sleep solutions do not include making your digestive system work hard at bedtime. It may be counterproductive and cause you to lose an effectively restful night.

2. Limit artificial light after dark

Man standing below multiple light bulbs that are lit up — Image by Klaus Hausmann from Pixabay

It’s hard to avoid artificial light in this technologically advanced world. But if you are aware of the bad effects it has on your sleep, you can use quality sleep solutions to limit it.

Being exposed to light after the sun goes down messes with your sleep rhythms. It initiates signals to your brain that it’s not time to go to sleep yet or even that it’s time to get up. Light hinders the release of melatonin, which is the natural chemical in your system that tells you to go to sleep.

Worst of all are blue light–emitting electronic devices, or LEDs. Researchers have found that people who look at tablet computers for 2 hours before bedtime experience low-quality sleep that can even continue for several nights after they looked at the tablet.

That’s why keeping your phone out of the bedroom is one of my quality sleep solutions. Once you’ve seen the last notification or text, put the phone to charge in another room or far from your reach. That’s also why you should shut off your TV an hour or two before sleep.

I admit that I don’t always follow this rule. But I counter it by having a soft light by the bed. I use the light to read a little before gently getting sleepier.

Matthew Walker, who wrote Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams, recommends some other quality sleep solutions like:

dimming lights
yellow tinted glasses to block out the blue light
software to desaturate the blue LED lights on devices as evening approaches

You could also try using blackout curtains as one of your quality sleep solutions if you live in a neighborhood with bright street lights and traffic lights.

3. Lower your thermostat at night

Digital thermostat on wall set to 71 degrees Fahrenheit

Most people’s body temperatures lower at night and that facilitates good sleep. However, because of our extreme habit of using temperature control in our homes, our bodies can’t regulate properly when the temperature is always the same.

As one of many quality sleep solutions, sleep researchers recommend lowering the current thermostat by 3 to 5 degrees at night. The ideal temperature is 65 degrees Fahrenheit (18.3 Celsius).

If that seems too cold to you, play around with it. But always make sure to drop it by a few degrees in comparison to the day time. Also, try a quiet fan to move some air around and cool the room down.

4. Keep a notepad and pen by your bed

Notepad with pen as a quality sleep solution for day-time and night-time note taking

Do you have what I call “thinking attacks” at night? Here’s what I mean: You wake up and start thinking about something that seems incredibly important at that moment.

Sometimes it is important, but often it’s just a minor issue. And that minor issue creates a major sleep problem in need of quality sleep solutions, stat!

Keeping a notepad and pen by your bed means that as soon as you have a new idea, you can write the idea down. I have gotten pretty good at writing in the dark myself. But if that’s not easy for you, get yourself a dim soft light just for these moments and don’t look directly at it.

Get everything out of your head! I emphasize this as one my quality sleep solutions in my time management course as well. Getting it out of your head will help it stay out so that you can sleep at night. I also include a notepad as one my top 10 time management tips for freelancers.

5. Try living without an alarm clock/snooze button

Digital alarm clock on a bedside table and set to 6:00

Try living without an alarm clock as one your quality sleep solutions. And for your own sake and that of those who love you, stop using the snooze button!

If you are following a regular sleep schedule, then you should be waking up at the hour that is natural for you. Morning larks, like me, start waking up around 5:30 or 6:00, so I make sure to go to bed by 10:00 each night. Night owls shudder at my schedule and are up until 2:00 and awake at 10:00.

Remember, you’re a freelancer, so you don’t have to report to anyone at their specified time! You do your work on your own schedule, so adjust your workload around your natural sleep patterns for a healthier life with quality sleep solutions.

If alarming your heart, quite literally, were not bad enough, using the snooze feature means that you will repeatedly inflict that cardiovascular assault again and again within a short span of time.”
– Matthew Walker in Why We Sleep, Kindle edition, p. 280

And if you insist on using an alarm clock or you need it for those one-off mornings when you have to be sure to get up at a certain minute, obstruct use of the snooze button by taping a small piece of carboard over it.

6. Limit caffeine and alcohol

Two images side by side: Coffee from a moka pot being poured into a cup; Red wine being poured from a bottle into a glass — Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay; Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay

I’m sure you know that caffeine has the power to keep you lively and energetic and wake you up in the mornings. But it also creates another one of those vicious cycles running counter to quality sleep solutions.

You drink your cuppa joe in the morning to wake up, have an afternoon pick-me-up in the afternoon, and sip a little java after dinner. Then you struggle to sleep, wake up groggy, and start the whole thing all over again.

The quality sleep solutions to get out of this cycle are to cut back on caffeine, if not completely, and follow a regular sleep schedule. Coffee substitutes include chicory root tea or Maya nut tea from Blue Zones.

You could also try decaf beverages or ones lower in caffeine like half-caff, or black or green tea. And try herbal tea in the evening; I enjoy a nice combo of chamomile and peppermint.

Some people suggest having a glass of wine at night instead of the after-dinner coffee for a pleasant lethargic effect. However, that effect is just sedative or anesthetic and not really sleep-inducing like your natural melatonin is. Your sleep then ends up fragmented and full of brief awakenings.

I hope these six quality sleep solutions help you begin having an effective sleep routine. If you have any other suggestions, please add them in the comments or share this post on social media using one of the links below.

And don’t forget to subscribe for my free ebook Quick Guide to Freelancing: Be Your Own Boss in Eight Basic Steps. You’ll also get access to more freelancing tips and stay up to date on my new courses and publications.

Finally, if you’d like to learn more time management strategies or get some writing tips, check out my courses on Udemy and LearnDesk.